Donnie Darko

Gretchen: My mom had to get a restraining order against my stepdad. He has emotional problems. Donnie: Oh, I have those too! What kind of emotional problems does your dad have? Gretchen: He stabbed my mom four times in the chest. Donnie: Oh.

Top Student

"So, you prepared for your [Statistics] test tomorrow?" he asked me. "Well, sort of," I replied. "Going to be the top student?" That was a most unexpected question. This semester has been, in the words of another friend, my sabbatical. "Nah," I said, "I know who my competition is." I forgot what he said next,... Continue Reading →

Bad Puns

Warming: Using these puns may get you seriously injured. ("In Jured? Where's Jured?") Lying in bed at night, I swore to tell the truth one day. In two years, I have ear wax. "You very mean, ah!" "Yes, you very minah..." (It's Melayu) "Have you ever met a politician who stands?" "Huh?" "I mean, they... Continue Reading →

Create a website or blog at

Up ↑