Bad Puns

Warming: Using these puns may get you seriously injured. (“In Jured? Where’s Jured?”)

  • Lying in bed at night, I swore to tell the truth one day.
  • In two years, I have ear wax.
  • “You very mean, ah!” “Yes, you very minah…” (It’s Melayu)
  • “Have you ever met a politician who stands?” “Huh?” “I mean, they all just keep lying you know.”
  • “Have you any nice puns?” “Naw. All my pants are ugly.”
  • “You heard about the protein powder?” “Yeah. I heard the anti-teen organisation banned it.”
  • “Okay, my telephone number’s 6373-7852.” “He did?” “Huh?” “Seven ate five too? Wow… I guess nine wasn’t enough.”

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