Comparison Shopping

“You know something?” he asks her.

“What about?” she replies.

“I was feeling a little bored today, so I went onto eBay and had some fun comparison shopping.”

“Okay. So what’s so special about that?”

“I decided to do a search for you.”

“Uh-huh… and?”

“And… I found nothing.”

He looks at her, cheeks flushed red, and adds, “I found… that nothing compares to you.”

==========

Update: I always update the board outside my door whenever a new thought comes up… and the current board picture was inspired by this post. Here’s a picture:

Nothing Compares 2u

She Looked at Me

And I said, “You know, life’s so complicated now. It’s like, there’s so many things happening — there’s just so much sh*t. But you know what? I like it this way. Imagine if all this hadn’t happened, life would be so… uninteresting. You know what I mean?”

She nodded.

I continued, “oddly enough, I like all these things happening. I wouldn’t say that it hasn’t given me stress. I wouldn’t say that it’s actually been nice, because it definitely hasn’t been. There’s been lots of pain; lots of uncertainty; confusion. But oddly enough, I like it.”

Moving On (from that Unfortunate Incident)

Whatever happened happened.
Whatever didn’t didn’t.
That is the truth.
Perceptions matter much in everyday affairs.
But on this matter, I’m willing to concentrate on nothing but the truth.
And what do you know?
The truth remains, as it always has been:
Behind a veil of uncertainty, of unknowns.

Maybe that is the cue for you to say,
“Because the truth is uncertain, you don’t know what really happened.
And you cannot judge me on that.”
And I will be forced, by truth’s very nature, to agree with you.
The truth we can never know, can we?
And that being said and done, I shall say,
“Whatever happened happened.
Whatever didn’t didn’t.”

That is the truth.
Let’s move on.

Psyching Out an Opponent

I would just like to share with you this passage I came across in a fantastic book I’m currently reading, called Winning – The Psychology of Competition, by Stuart H. Walker:

Provocation and intimidation may effectively neutralise some competitors. Evoking guilt feelings may be more effective with others. Some of your competitors are saying, like the typical five-year-old child, “I’m such a nice kid, you wouldn’t beat me, would you?” Many competitors want to make it perfectly clear that they are racing under a handicap. One of the top finishers in the 1976 Soling trials proclaimed repeatedly that his crew members were not only incompetent but uncooperative. “I still don’t have the mast put together.” “I’m using that old main that blew out last year.” “I was testing a new jib that I knew was wrong.” “You’re not going to use your good sails for this unimportant race, are you?” “I haven’t been able to practice for three months.” Poor souls! They may be looking for an excuse to reassure themselves, but if they elicit your sympathy, your concern for their problem, they’ve achieved a psych-out. They have you preoccupied with their game rather than your own.

I had a friend who used to do this all the time. But glad to say, his psych-outs didn’t work, heh!

On Needing Solitude

Solitude is something I haven’t had for a very long a time.

Staying in a place like Currie Hall (a student hostel just off the University of Western Australia) has meant that I have found very little, if any, time and/or opportunities to be alone.

Solitude, for me, is a need, not a want. I believe everyone needs some time alone to clear their minds. While some people require only a little bit of time alone to recharge, others need a little more.

Through experience, I have found that I fall into the latter group.

And that’s why I’m currently proposing the idea of getting away from it all a few days this week. To just hide myself and shy away from people: to disappear completely.

Maybe after this, I’ll be able to focus more energies into the masking of myself, letting other people see what they want to see: my happier side.

The Tipping Point

I had been pretty much okay for the past few weeks since arriving here in Perth. But over the past week, I have been feeling more sapped of energy than ever before.

Then this morning came the tipping point.

Hoping to get some time alone, I went down for breakfast a little late. It wasn’t long, however, before I was joined by a couple of people staying on my floor.

Let’s just say that some comments were passed by one of them that made me excuse myself early.

I wanted to ask her, “I don’t judge you, why do you judge me?”

But for her sake and mine, I dropped the matter.

Judgements

The problem with community living is that you see people long enough to think you can make accurate judgements of their character. But who are we to judge?

I think it is time for me to disappear for a while. And I hope they won’t judge me on that.

Miswanting

I came across an article called Why Career Planning is Time Wasted. It takes an interesting look at our abilities in predicting our future wants.

This article introduces this term called “Miswanting”, used to describe how we may wrongly predict what we want in the future.

It occurred to me that this not only applied to our careers, but also to our marriages: who can predict what a person will be like after we are married to him or her?

Which leads me to believe that the institution of marriage probably won’t die in the near future.

Miswanting

“We are poor at predicting what will make us happy in the future.”

The idea of making mistakes about what we might want in the future has been termed ‘miswanting’ by Gilbert and Wilson (2000). They point to a range of studies finding we are poor at predicting what will make us happy in the future. My favourite is a simple experiment in which two groups of participants get free sandwiches if they participate in the experiment – a doozie for any undergraduate.

One group has to choose which sandwiches they want for an entire week in advance. The other group gets to choose which they want each day. A fascinating thing happens. People who choose their favourite sandwich each day at lunchtime also often choose the same sandwich. This group turns out to be reasonably happy with its choice.

Amazingly, though, people choosing in advance assume that what they’ll want for lunch next week is a variety. And so they choose a turkey sandwich Monday, tuna on Tuesday, egg on Wednesday and so on. It turn out that when next week rolls around they generally don’t like the variety they thought they would. In fact they are significantly less happy with their choices than the group who chose their sandwiches on the day.”

Rivercruise 2007

Went for some event called “Rivercruise” last week, organised by Currie Hall (UWA). There was some pretty wild dancing and drinking and having fun (and yes, I know fun’s relative).

I wasn’t intending to post any pictures, nor am I intending to, but here’s some links to it.

Wei Hao’s
River Cruise Set 1/2 (59 pictures)
River Cruise Set 2/2 (42 pictures)

Mifang’s
River Cruise Set 1/1 (6 pictures)

One day some of these pictures are going to come back and haunt me.

“Mr. Lee, what do you think of those pictures published in the newspaper about you being groped during your university days?”

“I’ll just like to say that we all do stupid things. I was young then.”

Incomprehensible

How odd.

The closer I got to her,
the less I seemed able to comprehend
the person she was.

The more I knew about her,
the less I understood.

And that led me to
want to get away;
away from her;
away from all she stood for.

The unknown in some circumstances
create mystery and intrigue;
but for her the unknown created
confusion and insecurity within.

How I wish I could
tell her to stop
being the enigma
that she was.

Girl,
Stop hiding.
Reveal yourself.

Let me see
Who you really
are.