Taking the Raft

In many teachings of Buddhism, Buddhism itself has been compared to a raft used to cross a river. After it has served its purpose (i.e. used to cross the river), it should be discarded or let go.

I had always thought myself to be agnostic, rejecting God insofar as He cannot be proven. But I think that after I decided to turn officially “agnostic” (and moving away from my Catholic roots), I’ve held many beliefs that are closer to being atheistic than agnostic.

I’ve found myself developing in me an aversion to religion, and felt that if I ever turned back to religion, it would have been a sign of weakness.

But just today, feeling a little depressed and helpless, I found myself needing some form of affirmation. I needed something or someone to tell me that everything was going to be alright. And I felt a very strong urge to pray.

But I fought it.

And then I started asking myself, “why discard the raft when you haven’t even used it yet?”